Archive for May, 2010

The H-Bomb

May 16, 2010 1 comment

Two words:

Alan. Wake.

This game had better be as goddamn good as we’re being led to believe, because I really have a feeling that when this game launches, everybody’s going to be really disappointed.

I’ll tell you why, too.


Hype is the reason for all our videogame-based disappointments. If you buy a game and have no idea what it’s going to be about, and don’t really have any hopes for it, you’re hardly going to be disappointed when it’s a pile of crap.

But, when you hear about Alone In The Dark for months on end, and about how its physics system is revolutionary, and that it’s going to be presented in an amazing episodic way, and all that crap, then you buy it, and it’s good for nothing but burning, of course you going to be disappointed.

The problem here is that publishers hype their games to death. They condemn their AAA title to bargain bin obscurity simply because they don’t know when to shut up. They rave for months prior to launch about how their game is going to revolutionise videogame story, graphics, and is going to be the most immersive thing since real life.

Sure, the game might be good. It might be fun, and it might be a nice little romp for 10 hours or so, but if it’s not as good as the publisher’s promises then it’s a retail failure.

So, why hype?

It’s really a question that needs asking. It seems like every time a publisher hypes something up, it falls flat. Unless it’s an established franchise (MW2, I’m talking to you), hype tends to fail. When are the publishers going to wake up and realise that screaming bloody murder about how amazing their game is not going to work? Advertising is one thing, but hype is another.

Got an opinion? Have you fallen victim to the hype trap? Fire off in the comments, and I’ll love you forever ❤

– Kalem


Paging Alan Wake…..

May 6, 2010 1 comment

Anyone who has been watching Machinima videos on YouTube for the past…… I don’t know how long, it’s probably like seventy years in Internet terms, will have noticed references to Alan Wake.

If you’re missing your quota of gumption you’ll be posting “Hey! WTF is up with the popups!? You suck Machinima! YOU SUUUUCK!!!11!!11!eleventy1!” or words to that effect in the comments section of every video they put up. If you have a small amount of gumption you’ll have turned annotations off.

Everyone else will know that Alan Wake is a game that is coming to the Xbox360, there are also mini episodes or tasters (mmmmm….morsels) – live action films to give you the creeps make you interested in the title.

The short films are a bit odd – anyone old enough to have watched Twin Peaks will be familiar with the level of wierdness. For everyone else, it’s weird! What!? You haven’t seen the films? Boot up your 360 (and by that, I mean turn it on, not kick it across the room) head to the market place and look for the download.

Can’t be bothered? What’s that you say?… “Just show me the damned game!” …thought so. Okay champ! Here goes – the guys at liketotallyawesome have had a sneaky peaky and reviewed. It looks like it’s going to be a pretty engaging game and blurs the line between cinema, gaming and entertainment even more.

Here’s the vid:

I’ve been David, and you’ve been awesome!

Peas and loaves.

Categories: xbox 360 Tags: ,

Halo: Reach Beta Impressions

May 6, 2010 4 comments

Everyone was super hyped about the Halo: Reach Beta, and it is a game from Bungie, so that comes naturally. I was not riding the hype train because if it did not play well in the end, I would have been with all the other anti-Halo people in saying that it completely sucks. My strategy paid off. Halo: Reach is Halo 3, no doubt. It feels like Halo 3, it looks like Halo 3, it even sounds like Halo 3. I’m not saying that it is a totally bad thing by any means, Halo 3 was a good game but Halo: Reach is just more of the same. Sure there is new weapons and abilities, but armor lock absolutely sucks during any game mode without vehicles. Sprint is only for oddball, even though you can’t even sprint with the oddball. Cloak sucks. And the jetpack is mainly what everyone uses. This game uses a point system to have you unlock armor pieces such as a helmet, shoulders, or a chest, but they really don’t do much other than make your spartan look slightly different. The game modes in the beta are the worst part of Halo, in my opinion. Oddball, CTF, and 4v4 Team Slayer are all you can play. I can’t wait till they get Invasion in, I like the big team playlists where you can actually work as a team. I have spent most of my beta time not wearing a headset for the plain and simple fact that the Halo community are full of racist douche-bags. Every time I go on, I hear some profanity out of some 1o year old’s mouth. What are parents teaching their kids these days? I am good at the game, don’t get me wrong (I usually get the highest kills or dominate in Oddball), but it’s just not that fun. Bungie could of also done a better job making it look different. Sure the new weapons look cooler and feel slightly different but whenever I look at the level design I always say to myself, “This could be in Halo 3.” Overall I like the fact that Bungie is trying something different with class based gameplay, even though it’s not really class based, but I think they just aren’t trying hard enough. I would like to see the single player and see how that pans out but this is probably not going to be my top multiplayer game of the year.